We’re All in the Same Ocean, but Not the Same Boat

 

     One thing we have constantly heard during Covid-19 is that we’re all in this together, and more specifically, we’re all in the same boat.  In fact, the sheer number of both radio and TV commercials attempting to drive home this point has been nothing short of mind numbing.

     Well, we’ve all been set in roughly the same murky waters simply based on the drastic measures taken regarding regulations at the work place and for nearly all means of recreation.  However, the reasons why Americans are NOT in the same boat during Corona virus as well as before it began, and after it is eliminated, are WAY too numerous to mention.  But I will offer a great number of variables which set each of our lives apart.

     Let’s start with the prime money expenditure of our lives.  Some people reside rent-free in a relative’s dwelling.  Others pay a modest to large amount every month in renting an apartment or house.  Then there are house payments, personal property and real estate taxes for small, medium, large and luxurious houses.

     Within that realm, there is the living situation gamut of being totally alone, having a significant other; living with several other family members including brothers, sisters, parents, offspring of all ages and grandparents.  Some people live in flood plains, tornado and hurricane havens, snow belts, high heat areas, safe neighborhoods and miniature war zones.

     Our means of transportation often vary a great deal from walking and/or relying on buses, Uber, taxis and the like to get around to driving an old jalopy, a decent vehicle to very expensive and even super luxurious ones.

     Then, there are great differences in work and finances based on age, educational background, choices of professions, job availability by areas, individual level of motivation, personality, attitude and both physical and mental health.  Nowadays, there is also who is considered an essential vs. a non-essential worker.

     The Covid CARES Act also likely affected the level of motivation of job seekers.  After all, the total of some $100-$300 of state unemployment payment plus an additional $600 a week of Federal was akin to being thrown a life jacket. The total funds were far more than many employees were paid by working 40 hours.  Some people saved the extra funds to help weather future potential financial storms.  Others spent it on essentials, while a good number of people chose to frivolously wash it away on unneeded material items.

     One popular, time-honored adage is “If you have your health, you have everything.”  Well, other than a good number of people on Medicare, healthcare costs vary greatly by who you work for or if you work at all.  There are also personal health choices based on specific diets, smoking, drinking, and drug usage.

     How your life is today may also be greatly affected by your spending and credit habits in the past, present and plans for the future.  There’s spending habits on groceries, regular store and online shopping, social life, holiday shopping, higher education choices and the incredibly different means of leisure and vacation travel. 

     The amount of funds in your IRAs, savings and checking accounts also may vary widely by any and all the above factors, plus any family inheritances.  Some people make poor investments and business decisions, blindly placing their trust in the wrong people that lead to debt and even bankruptcies.  This includes falling prey to scams.  Working long hours on faulty projects is far from a guarantee of profits.  That’s why there are numerous adages regarding working smart over working hard.

     Receipt of government perks is yet another area where those funds can be affected.  Are you always underwater financially with the need of a lifeboat or do you glide at several dozen knots well above the headwaters?

     How about personal behaviors that make us different from others? How do we think about certain topics?  Have you fallen prey to victim mentalities where you’re constantly blaming others for your own poor life choices?  Do you use your own brain to decide on specific issues? What are our means of communication regarding individual issues?  Do you always drop the anchor and stay in peaceful and tranquil waters or do you often rock the boat to the point of making huge waves?

    The above also includes the gamut from total introvert to extrovert.  How one was raised is another important factor, as in ‘kids learn what they live.’  However, that’s also increasingly shaped nowadays by what we are exposed to in the 24/7 media cycle.

     All the above items are factors that prove that, while we may all be in the same ocean, truly none of us are in the exact same boat.  After all, you are generally the captain of your own life. So, can you think of any other areas in which we differ?  How else do we navigate through the waters in what I refer to as the ripple effect of life in which our specific actions often lead to certain predictable results?

Meg Fitzgerald: West Senior Sets Sights on Touring Egypt

     Picture yourself riding camelback across the Sahara Desert towards the Pyramids of Giza or Cheops, exploring the Tomb of King Tutankhamun and cruising down the River Nile.  If Meg Fitzgerald gets her wish, she will undoubtedly do that and more next summer.

     Since as far back as the third grade, the mysteries of ancient civilizations have so captivated the Parkway West senior that the mere mention of Egypt has placed her in a near-hypnotic trance.

     

     Fitzgerald’s graduation request is a trip to that nation.  She then plans on continuing her education by studying Egyptology as a Near Eastern Languages and Civilizations major at the University of Chicago, one of the nation’s foremost learning institutions.

     “I’ve always loved reading about ancient history,” she said. “The people had such different lifestyles.  They didn’t have all the physical conveniences we have, but they still had marvelous wealth.  They made so much of what they had, and people still don’t understand it today.”

     While Fitzgerald strives to “Walk Like an Egyptian” in next year’s travels, walking is one of the things she tries to avoid on the basketball court.  At 6-feet-2, the Orlando, FL native has not always been a smooth performer on the hardcourt.

     “In ninth grade, I was terribly uncoordinated,” she said.  “Whit (Coach Hal Whiteaker) said I couldn’t walk and chew gum at the same time.  Even last year, I played with girls who had a lot more ability.”

      “I almost cut her as a freshman,” Whiteaker recalled.  “When Meg started out, she could barely hit the backboard.  The only reason I kept her was she was 6-foot.  But since then, she’s worked really hard to make the varsity."

     Actually, Fitzgerald, who grew up in San Jose, CA, is a tireless worker in several areas.  Besides doing preparatory lab work for Parkway West science classes, she has a strong musical background.

    Just before Thanksgiving, Fitzgerald was one of 32 Parkway girls who added vocal support for the presentation of DeBussy’s Nocturne for the Youth Symphony Orchestra at Powell Hall. She will also be part of the Bach Society’s Christmas event to be held there Dec. 22-23.

     Besides Fitzgerald, the Longhorns return an abundance of talent in 6-foot, all-metro forward Paige Ewaldsen and fleet-footed 5-3 senior guard Dora Phillips.

     Senior Roanne Daniels; juniors Amy Rossi, Aliy Zirkle and Monique Breeland; and sophomores Liz Pedersen, Laura Ewaldsen and Bettina Schubert, April Warden and Sheri McLanahan will try and help West improve on last year’s 21-7 record.

It’s Time to Take CHARGE of Your Life

     If you haven’t done so in awhile, this is the perfect time to CHARGE!  No, I’m not referring to your shopping habits.  This is a FAR greater lifestyle decision!

    

     I don’t normally recommend reading material, but this month is the 40^th anniversary of the first printing of “Rhinoceros Success.”  The book was written by Scott Alexander with a wonderful variety of illustrations by Laurie Alexander.  

     There’s a great deal of victim mentality throughout today’s society.  But read this book, follow several of the simple, yet often whimsical instructions, and that victimhood will soon be left in the dust like a charging rhino on a dry, southern Africa plain.

     Long ago, the forty-third print version of this little paperback book, back in February 1990, helped provide the stimulus to not only vastly increase my freelance writing markets, but also to push me into a wide variety of creative writing for pay venues.  This was after 10 solid years of writing for good pay while working the last seven years of that decade in a different type of full-time job.

                                                                   

     “Rhinoceros Success” appeared to me at the time my full-time job was ending and I was awaiting my son to be born. While starting a different job on a part-time basis, and still doing many of the same types of writing I had done throughout, the book helped inspire me to achieve a wide variety of other creative monetary successes even though I had FAR from the book’s rhinoceros mentality.

     Yet it is a must read and continual reference type item for all who are seeking extra motivation for any venture, and also for those who are already on the right path.  After all, there are times when every person could use a little extra charge command whether it be a greater need of focus, discipline, persistence or determination.

     The book is divided into 15 small chapters, starting with “The Art of Charging,” followed by “Rhinoceros Training,” and culminates in “Become a Rhinoceros Today.” It’s a very easy and fun read which includes 13 illustrations accompanied by brief commands.

     Some of the ‘charging’ areas include charging down opportunities, and also charging through adversity and temporary setbacks.  After all, as the book states, “Not even rhinoceroses make it to the top of the hill without slipping a few times.”

          

    Another top line from the book is, “The more energy you put into something, the more you are going to get out of it.”  On that note, it’s rather fitting that, even back in 1980, Alexander notes that in order to stay more positive, turn off the television news!

     Ironically, one of my favorite quotes of the book, which I believe sums up “Rhinoceros Success,” actually comes from someone who made a good deal of his living from TV viewers.  Televangelist Dr. Robert Schuller once said, “It is better to attempt something great and fail than to attempt nothing and succeed.”

     You don’t think you have what it takes to be a rhinoceros?  Imposs-ceros!  “Rhinoceros Success” will prove you wrong! It will inspire you, motivate you and guide you through the many, tangled jungles of life’s journey!

20-20 MIND-SIGHT: Mental Mastery Has Champion Biathlete Lyle Nelson on Target

     Lyle Nelson is living proof that the seemingly straight and narrow pathways of life are often transformed into unpredictable, winding roads.

     Ever since he began displaying outstanding competitive skiing skills at age 5, it was a safe bet that Nelson would become an Olympic skier.  After all, each of the 10 McCall, Idaho natives who had previously qualified for the Games had done so in that sport.

     “I had so many role models, encouragement and support that my personal belief in making it as an Olympic skier was high,” Nelson said.  “But after graduating from West Point (in 1971 with a degree in engineering sciences), I was assigned to the military biathlon unit instead of infantry.  I had to learn to shoot over several years.  So, it was like I begrudgingly became a biathlete (the biathlon combines cross country skiing and shooting) because I was always a skier.”

     But Nelson not only broke the pattern of his hometown, he also became a four-time Olympian in the process.  Nelson accomplished the feat with what he refers to as “dedication to excellence.”

     “My first approach is, ‘Whatever everyone else does, do 10 per cent more,’” said the 39-year-old Essex Junction, VT resident.  “For two straight years—during my junior and senior years in college—I lifted weights from 11 p.m. to 1 a.m. every night, and almost always got up at 6 a.m.  It was my strategy for success, and it worked.  It got me into the door and onto the Olympic team.”

     But that was just a small measure of Nelson’s overall workout.  He supported himself in the mid-1970s through a variety of jobs which the average person would consider beneath him.  Nelson knew exactly what he was doing.

     “I used to only take jobs that looked incredibly hard,” Nelson said.  “It had to require some type of digging, heavy pushing or pulling.  It’s like I was taking a job and got paid to train all day.  I’d tell them that I’d work harder than they could believe, four hours a day.  Me and this Norwegian skier had a logging job in California that paid us $200 a week.  The harder we worked, the more he paid us.”

     It obviously paid dividends.  Nelson’s leg of the four-person, 30-kilometer relay was the fifth best (total time of run plus an additional 30-second penalty for each of the 10 targets missed) among 68 international participants at the 1976 Winter Games in Innsbruck, Austria.

     After another good showing in the 1980 Lake Placid games, Nelson further displayed his athletic abilities by winning NBC television’s 1984 version of “Survival of the Fittest,” which relied on outstanding mountainside skills.  But around then, Nelson learned that sheer athletic prowess was not enough to ensure an Olympic biathlon medal.

     “By the 1984 games (in Sarajevo, Yugoslavia), I realized that the lack of greater mental skills kept me from winning the gold medal,” Nelson said.  “That’s what the shooting segment requires—100 per cent mental skills.  But that’s what I needed to know in the ‘70s when I was more athletic.  I was a real hard-trained, hard-pushing athlete who always thought that thinking got in the way of athletics.

     “What I needed to learn was self-confidence and what was needed to be properly motivated—to change bad attitudes and correct training procedures.  I remember sitting down and writing every variable necessary in biathlon.  I was surprised to find that there were 15 in all, and physical ability was needed in only one.”

     Besides his marriage, career in medical science with the Air National Guard, Ph.D. studies in human development at the Fielding Institute of Santa Barbara, CA, and countless speaking engagements, Nelson cited his refusal to see himself go “downhill” as another reason to bow out of Olympic competition.  But that in no way signifies a “winning is everything” attitude for him.

     What Nelson will miss most is the true spirit of international competition in a sport where national boundaries are hardly obvious.

     “In our sport, it’s not Americans vs. Russians or Americans vs. East Germans,” Nelson said.  “We’re all good friends who constantly joke about each other’s country, coach and culture.  The fact that we’re all good friends is incredible considering we have rifles and about 50 per cent of us are in the military.  That’s what I’ll miss the most—the camaraderie.”

Carrying Flag Was a Source of Pride

     The U.S. flag has turned up in some exotic locations over the past few decades.

     During World War II, “Old Glory” was dramatically hoisted over Mount Suribachi on the small Pacific island of Iwo Jima.  On July 20, 1969, Neil Armstrong gallantly planted our flag into the surface of the moon.

     It was with similar pride and honor that biathlete Lyle Nelson carried his nation’s flag into Calgary’s McMahon Stadium in the parade of nations which opened February’s (1988) Winter Olympic Games.      

     “When you walk into an Olympic stadium, you experience a different kind of cheer than from any other sport,” Nelson said.  “It’s not the type where you’re told to kill the other team.  Instead, it’s a feeling of all nations being together and everyone cheering for peace and friendly competition.

     “I almost wished I could have turned around and yelled something, but I was walking way out in front of everyone else on the team.  You can take everything else from my four different Olympics.  That two-minute walk was it for me.”

     Nelson was selected flag-bearer through a popular vote of the entire American entourage.  But the choice was not made until each of the 10 captains presented a nomination speech for an athlete in his sport.

     “Josh Thompson is my captain, and he was very eloquent in his argument for me,” Nelson said.  “He not only explained that I’m the only four-time Olympian and the oldest person on the team (39), but also that I’ve written and been published on the topic.  He argued that I’m not just an athlete, but part of the Olympic spirit.

     "I was pretty excited about it.  I've made a fairly serious commitment to the Olympic spirit in fitness, youth sports and promotion of good will.  To be recognized as a model Olympian after all that hard work, is extremely rewarding.  It's probably like Galileo the first time he actually saw something through the telescope!"

Guardian Angels are Everywhere!

     It all started after my girlfriend and I spent more than a week combing through a 12-state area. We learned there were slim pickings regarding much of a travel-laden, extended Memorial Day weekend.  Due to COVID-19 shutting down nearly all attractions, both indoors and out, we had whittled down our plans to Kansas City. 

     Even then, we were forced to choose among limited time slots offered online at the zoo.  Similar choices existed for Sea Life Aquarium at Crown Center.  There were a good number of hiking options, but the latest forecasts showed heavy rain for nearly all four days!  So, it was down to staying much closer to home with three or four Friday hikes.

     But in the famous words of a Robert Frost poem, “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go astray.”  And Friday’s hiking extravaganza never quite materialized.

     We arrived at Pickle Springs Natural Area at 9:35 a.m.  I unknowingly passed the first small parking area of the 77-mile drive, and turned into the adjacent one.  Luckily, it was a lot larger and deeper because within 20 feet of entering that lot and attempting to turn right into a parking space, my car briefly sputtered and died.  I tried to restart it.  But even though it more than sputtered, the car did everything but turn over.

     Since I just had a new battery installed within the last two months, I knew it wasn’t that.  But after paging through the 200-page-plus owner’s manual, we had no idea why this vehicle, with just over 45,000 miles, decided to shut down.

     At that time, Pickle Springs was set to be our first of four or five scheduled stops for the day.  There was just one other car and it was on the first lot.  Within a half hour, a half dozen more cars arrived.  I asked just about everyone if they could perhaps observe one of my attempts of starting the car and help diagnose the problem.  But everyone refused to even listen.

     That was both before and after we called a company to try and arrange a tow of the car to a service station somewhere close to Farmington.  We were told that tow truck drivers could try to jump start and tow vehicles, and could request to diagnose the problem, but could not guarantee it. We were also told there were probably no places open in Farmington that could actually fix my car during this Memorial Day weekend.

     Also, a tow truck driver could try and jumpstart my car, but if we drove it again, it could have died out again around there or even on the highway.  In addition to having to be towed again, that could be extremely dangerous.

     The kicker was that it was company policy merely to tow the vehicle, but not take any passengers due to the fairly recent corona virus.  So, we went back and forth with that company. 

     Meanwhile, I spoke to the owner of my long-time service station, whose shop is a couple miles from my house and 90 miles from here.  He said to bring my car there, as they were open until 5 p.m. 

     But there was one other problem.  How would we get back to that location?  We were wondering how much it would cost for an Uber to pick us up and drive us that far or if we even knew anyone we could call who would be willing to drive down there to pick us up.

     In the interim, I approached several people among another 10 cars that pulled into the two parking lots.  Finally, a young man and his wife, plus their two young children not only listened to my car, but showed sympathy throughout the episode.  Ironically, they lived just a mile on the other side of the same service station.

     That’s when our guardian angel stepped in.  We received a call from a man at an area tow truck company who said that, even with the COVID-19 scare, he would let us ride in his truck and take us back with the towed vehicle to our St. Louis area station. He said that helping others any way he could was his personal mantra.

    

     While we rode in the vehicle, we learned a great deal about the driver.  The first thing was that, he didn’t expect to be in the business very long, but once again, he enjoyed going the extra mile (no pun intended) to help others.  In the drive of some 90-100 minutes, he gave several details of that lifestyle in both his personal and professional life.

     The driver described his personal life of being born in Florida from a broken home and living in a foster home at the age of 11.  That’s when his father had passed away, but not before he taught and indoctrinated into his son the value of hard work and helping others.  Ironically, I was wearing a shirt this day that had Florida cities and attractions all over it!

     Although he was putting in countless hours and miles sometimes driving people as much as a couple hundred miles or more, he started his own physical location business recently. It’s also in a field that helps others. 

     Our driver said the part he likes least about being in business is dealing with money matters.  He said he hates money!  He also mentioned how, in his view, it’s strange how so many young people nowadays don’t possess a very good work ethic.  On that note, he described a very low-key manual labor position that paid $36/hour for a 40-hour job, but all the company found was one young man who lasted just two days.

     While all these stories unraveled and all three of us spoke about various aspects of today’s world, I mentioned he was like our Clarence, the guardian angel from “It’s a Wonderful Life.”

     The driver just laughed and reiterated, “If I can help people, I will.  That’s the most important thing.”

     As the driver pulled out of the service station parking lot in the St. Louis area, I noticed a large ‘In God We Trust’ sticker on the back of the truck window.  When he turned onto the main street, we waved goodbye.  The honking of the truck horn could easily have been mistaken for the sound of bells.  This driver definitely earned his wings with us!

Covid-19 Impacts Ballwin’s Recreation, Events and Finances

(published on May 12 in West Newsmagazine)

     
   Like countless get-togethers over the past several weeks, the May 11 Ballwin Board of Aldermen Meeting was solely available for viewing through ZOOM video conferencing. 

     Modern technology aside, the first half of the meeting was representative of how the city has conducted its business over the long term.  It was audit presentation time.

     Rich Gratza and Allison Weems, of the accounting firm Kerber, Eck and Braeckel, took turns praising Ballwin and its finance committee, led by Finance Officer Denise Keller.  Their major points reflected Ballwin’s continued progress in multiple areas while maintaining balance sheets where expenditures are consistently exceeded by revenues.

     Due to COVID-19, Ballwin is set to be even more stringent in its spending in the last half of 2020 while balancing health concerns and future fun.

     In answer to emailed questions after the meeting, Keller provided a wide variety of updates.

     “Concerning upcoming events, we have cancelled our Ballwin Days Festival and our Memorial Day program,” Keller replied.  “We are working on plans to schedule an event in the fall that has some of the elements of Ballwin Days, but on a smaller scale.  Our Summer Concert Series has been pushed back to the fall as well. We anticipate still holding our Craft Beer Festival in September, but with modifications.  New events we are adding include a Celebrate Summer Drive Thru Parade and a Virtual 5K Run.”

     Keller also said the city will consult more with St. Louis County before deciding when to reopen The Pointe at Ballwin Commons Recreation Center, North Pointe Aquatic Center and its summer camp programs.  Each of those opportunities will also include modifications.

     Increases in the admission fees/membership rates were decided upon several months ago to help offset some of the mandated minimum wage increases the city expected to incur as a result of primarily summertime employment.  Since they have already been implemented, Keller said the city would take a wait and see approach for any potential fee adjustments based on factors such as when venues might open and what allowable capacities will be.

     “The city is reducing costs when and where we can to offset the revenue shortfalls we are experiencing from our closed recreation facilities and the anticipated reductions in sales tax receipts,” Keller said.  “We have a strong reserve fund balance which is enabling us to maintain our full-time staffing level, although we have implemented a hiring freeze for full-time positions.”

     A few other COVID-related items were revealed at the Board meeting.

     A motion was passed unanimously for Ballwin to go to what Mayor Tim Pogue described as a ‘summer schedule’ for near future Board meetings.  The first meeting of the month will be cancelled for June, July and August, with meetings taking place only on the fourth Monday of those months.

     “Hopefully, we’ll be able to hold those meetings in person with social distancing instead of these ZOOM meetings,” Pogue said.

     Another item that was unanimously agreed upon was the extension of the end date for long-time City Administrator Bob Kuntz’s final term of office from May 31 to June 30.

     Keller said the Board was in the process of interviewing candidates for the position so Kuntz could retire, again.  Interviews are currently being conducted through ZOOM, but finalists will be interviewed in person after restrictions have been relaxed, she said.

  Ironically, Kuntz was in the limelight just prior to the board meeting adjournment.

     “Thanks to Mr. (Chris) Conway (director of parks and recreation), I have very attractive city of Ballwin face masks for each one of you,” Kuntz said.  “They are personally engraved, so you won’t confuse them with others.  If you go to any official function, you have your official city of Ballwin face mask.  I can arrange to get them to any of you.  They are very attractive for this situation!”

    At the request of Keller, Kuntz even modeled one of the dark blue items with white lettering.

     “I’ll be here (for mine) first thing in the morning!” Alderman Mark Stallman (Ward 2) said, noting when he would arrive to pick up his mask.

Always Appreciate the Simple Wonders of Life

     

      When athletes are on a hot streak, they are said to be in the zone.  That’s precisely how I felt after work yesterday evening simply because I was alone in nature.  After all, my mindset is akin to Henry David Thoreau at Walden Pond; John Muir or Gifford Pinchot in forest or mountain solitude.

     Throughout my 8-4 work shift, I was literally praying that it would not rain during that ensuing time period.  That was after I met outdoors with my favorite once-a-week vendor in a light rain shower at mid-morning.

     Things looked promising most of the day.  Then it started raining as soon as I sprinted from the work place and got to my car.  Just five minutes later, it was pouring combined with lightning bolts in the west southwestern sky that seemed to travel from the skyline far into the stratosphere.

     But soon as I had parked my car at Creve Coeur Park’s Sailboat Cove, as I had done hundreds of times, the shower had ended.  It was as if my guardian angel had parted the clouds like Moses had parted the Red Sea.

     I normally walk around the entire lake counter-clockwise, which had been forbidden over the past two weeks due to the ungodly corona virus outbreak.  It didn’t matter how sick I was of the term ‘social distancing’ or TV and radio commercials proclaiming ‘We’re all in this together,’ etc. etc. etc.  I wanted to be alone in nature.

     So, after a brisk 10-minute walk in the demanded clockwise position on the paved trail, I made a sharp turn to my right and continued in that direction and all the way back on the nice, soft sand along the lake’s edge.

     On this 75-degree day, how I enjoyed the cool, fresh ‘ocean’ breeze tangling my long, salt and pepper brown hair.  I was lost in time as if I was back exploring some of the great coastal and landlocked beaches I’ve had the privilege to enjoy while exploring all 50 states and beyond.  While walking, I was reminiscing about coastal beach giants like Waikiki, Panama City, Cannon, Acadia and Valdez.

     I was also content to amble about, tuning out the remainder of civilization, collecting colorful pebbles and rocks of a wide variety of colors just as I have always done in other states.  The reason for this is that I have always enjoyed the simple things in nature…well before COVID-19 hit to enjoy its millisecond of time in the earth’s history.

     How about you?  What are some of the simple things in life you will choose to enjoy that perhaps you have taken for granted for lengthy stretches of your life?

     I know that many of you have let all aspects of the pandemic totally overtake your way of life and your psyche for two straight months.  But how will your thought process change in the coming weeks?  It’s 100 per cent up to you because, whether you realize it or not, we are not all in the same boat for this or just about any other areas of life. 

     Like a wide variety of diamonds, we were all created as individuals with an opportunity to exhibit our own special facets in the Great Human Potential of life itself.  And the time to start realizing that is in this very moment!  So, go find your own zones of wonderment in both work and play!