Copyright 2013...Jeff Greenberg...All Rights Reserved
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Friday, April 5, 2013

Meetup is the Best Solution for the Socially Inept Amongst Us


Have you ever talked yourself out of attending an event due to shyness or self-conscious tendencies?  Do you assume that your social inadequacies would make you feel somewhat akin to a square peg in a round hole?  Perhaps you have a phobia for large social settings or don’t feel you are a good enough small talker.

For those reasons and more, I have missed many a fun event in my life. 

Long ago, I luckily discovered a great means of dealing with those personality disorders.  Outside of actual medication or psychiatric help, the best solution for the socially inept amongst us is Meetup.

Just go to www.meetup.com, and a world of possibilities will immediately open up to you.  As it states on the site itself, “Meetup is the world’s largest network of local groups.”



I know that the term ‘something for everyone’ is often greatly overused and exaggerated in our society.  But that’s precisely what Meetup offers.

Meetup activities run the gamut from small to medium to large group functions; the totally sedate to extremely active; and completely mindless to extraordinarily brain-challenging.  But the best thing of all is that there is generally no membership fee or cost to join Meetup other than what you pay for admissions or tickets to events, and money for gasoline and your own food.  But many people carpool to some events.

The groups I currently belong to and frequent the most are Fun Peeps, Living Life to the Fullest, Singles Again, St. Louis Volunteer Group, St. Charles County Baby Boomer, and Let’s Hike.

I will forever remember my first Meetup event just as I have my first woman.

It was an overwhelmingly hot and humid Saturday or Sunday in early summer 2006.  The event was a group picnic in St. Louis’ Forest Park through The Activity Group, to which I still belong.

Always early, I was the first of some 35 people to arrive amongst those who signed up in advance.  Not knowing a single member, I wandered around a bit, asking various strangers if they were there for a Meetup event.  You obviously won’t experience this when meeting at a restaurant, coffee shop, or any other much smaller venue than a city park!

I finally connected with a woman name Anne, who I still see several times a year through Meetup, including a hike tomorrow morning at Fort Bellefontaine.  Together, we found the correct picnic spot.  Each person brought a covered dish to complement a big-time BBQ!  I met a dozen or so people in that first hour of eating and socializing.

From there, many of us either carpooled or walked the half mile or so in the heat index of about 100 degrees, to the Forest Park Boathouse.  We rented pedal boats with up to four to a boat for an hour.  We pedaled around all the beautiful and cool fountains well below a hill that houses The St. Louis Art Museum.  I’ve lived in St. Louis my entire life, but never did that before!

After hiking back to the picnic site with another new friend, the socializing continued with more snacking, drinking, and desserts.  There were even a few picnic style activities, but it was far too hot to partake in too much of that.

But after that one single event, I have been totally hooked on Meetup as an active member of seven or eight groups.  Those groups alone have helped me form great acquaintances and friendships with several hundred people!  They provide some 20-30 or so event choices every single month!  I know some people who belong to 50 or more of the several hundred area Meetup groups.  You do the math!!!

There are Meetup groups for every age group starting at 21, and for just about every type of interest available to man or woman!  Another benefit is that there are groups to attend in mornings, afternoons, evenings, and late nights.

Meetups include several dining groups like West County Dining Group and Dine Out on a Dime, very active groups like St. Louis Adventure Group and Single Christian Adventure Group, ones for couples, dancers, those into a variety of sports, playing cards and board games, movie going, political, spiritual, live plays, Happy Hours that often draw more than 100 people, karaoke, business and networking, etc.  It’s also easy for anyone to start their own Meetup group right from the site!

There are also several parameters on the site to easily find most of the choices.  Just plug in your zip code, distance willing to travel, and also key words for interests.

We attend a few very small gatherings all the way up to huge ones like the Happy Hours, recent Mardi Gras and St. Patrick’s Day parades, and the Mega Meetup Party held this past Saturday, March 30th.  It was dubbed “Take Me Out to the Ballroom” in honor of the start of the Cardinals’ baseball season.  Most of the more than 500 of us who signed up were clad in a wide array of baseball garb to party and dance to the band Crossfire after reserving The Casa Loma Ballroom to ourselves!

So, you say you’re a bored and lonely person with little to do and with very few friends?   You say you’re not very outgoing or sociable?  Sorry!  Those excuses just won’t fly in Meetup!  Most of us are extremely friendly and welcoming to all newcomers!  So, head to www.meetup.com and start your new adventures!  If I could do it, anyone can!




6 comments:

  1. That's a great article, Jeffry! Meetup is my passion. Being an organizer (and I'm honored that you mentioned my group!) and creating events for people to meet new friends and develop closer friendships is very rewarding for me. You are one of my long time buddies, Jeffry, that I met over 5 years ago because of Meetup. There's no excuse anymore for people to sit at home because they don't have any friends to do anything with. We welcome newbies with open arms. Meetup is a life-changing experience. I am amazed every day that I have so many friends because of Meetup. Many people don't know that Meetup was born because of 9/11. Two men started Meetup in New York City to help people comfort each other after that terrible tragedy, and 12 years later there are over 13 million members in over 127,000 Meetup groups all over the world. 9/11 changed the world, but in a good way, too. Hats off to Meetup...making friends for life!

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  2. Thanks so much for the wonderful response, Peggy! You have brought SOOOO much happiness to so many people with all the hours you've spent in planning so many terrific events!

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  3. Hey Jeffry, what a great discussion. Meetup has been a lifesaver for me as well as friends I've recommended to it. Its a social network that I recommend to my clients when encouraging them to "reach out" or "break out" into a social world. A means of interacting socially and becoming involved in activities with others who enjoy the same activity. A means to help those who feel isolated and want to meet people in a safe and fun environment. When I moved to SoCal in 2005, I didn't know but one person. The work environment was not inclusive to being social outside the office, so I felt extremely alone leaving behind a huge network of friends and family in the Mid-West. A friend told me about meetup and how she utilized it to go on hikes and take pictures with others who enjoyed the same activity. I still didn't look into it, until I decided to move to the St. Louis area. I decided I didn't want to replay the "alone game" again, so I joined a few groups before actually moving. I too joined Singles Again, Living Life to the Fullest, and Fun Peeps. I also joined Single Women over 40. I made some beautiful and deep connections that I would have missed had I not stepped out of my comfort zone. Meetup is a fabulous means of meeting people and enjoying life with others. You are one of those long time and deep connections I made and will cherish forever. Thanks for the opportunity to share. ~Tonya

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    1. Thanks, Tonya, for the deep and complete thoughts, and also the kind words. The feeling is 100% mutual! My emphasis in writing this article was to let people know that Meetup is great for those who may be socially awkward. But I don't want people to think it's only for that type of person. Many who join are totally outgoing from the outset.

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  4. Had to laugh at how you remember your first time, because I'll never forget mine, either. I was a total soccer mom with no single friends until I joined. As hard as it was to get up the courage to meet up with a bunch of strangers that first time, they made me feel so at home that it encouraged me not only to try new groups, but to try all sorts of new things. The chain reaction they started has made me feel happier than I've felt in years.

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    1. Thanks, Tammy! That pretty much epitomizes my Meetup experience and that of so many other people! Like so many things in life, we may enter with a feeling of trepidation, but once we take that first step, we're hooked for life!

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